Self-Insight Quizzes
Whether you’re healing after heartbreak, feeling stuck in a pattern, or just curious why you keep choosing the same kind of partner, these self-insight tools will help you understand the nervous system and attachment wiring behind your relationship dynamics. Choose the one that resonates most; or explore all three.
About This Model
The Nervous System Style™ framework you see here was created by Krista Lachapelle, social scientist, counsellor, and trauma-aware relationship coach, to help you understand what’s really driving your patterns in love.
These five styles aren’t personality types or pathologies. They’re protective adaptations, brilliant ways your nervous system learned to cope, connect, and survive in response to the relational environments you came from.
You may have learned to perform for love, shut down to stay safe, read the room to avoid conflict, withdraw when things got too close, or slowly rebuild self-trust after years of not feeling seen.
Each one of those strategies makes sense. Each one was wise.
This model blends research-backed insights from attachment science, polyvagal theory, and trauma-informed counselling, but the style names themselves (like The Anxious Achiever or The Romantic Avoider) are unique to Krista’s work at Beacon Hill. They were designed to reflect how these patterns feel in real life, not just how they’re labeled in textbooks.
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Understanding your style is the first step in returning to your secure self, the part of you that already knows how to move through love with clarity, calm, and self-honour. Rooted in polyvagal theory, this quiz helps you understand how your body responds to relational stress and what kind of regulation strategies you need. It is the beginning of helping you to understand how to regulate distress in real time.
You’re not broken. You’re not too much.
You’re just wired for protection, and that wiring can change.